What Is True For Me Right Now - Six/?

Well, first - what is true for Me right now is that the number six on this keyboard is not working at all. Hahaha!

What else is true for Me right now is my decision that my indecisiveness, my confusion, my not knowing is, perhaps, a gift. No, it is - I’m deciding that it is. Something strange happened yesterday and in the days that preceded (the 3 days, to be exact), I had been given messages and guidance that ultimately allowed Me to respond in a way that I usually wouldn’t to the strangeness that occurred.

I’d become used to being anxious and fearful - of priming myself by seeing a thing happening as automatically bad so that I could brace myself for what would come next. Instead, I decided that I don’t know how this strange and sudden happenstance is going to pan out - I don’t know what it will ultimately mean for Me, and I choose to see that as good. I said out loud - “I’m accepting that God/The Universe’s imagination is more expansive than mine - this could turn out more miraculous than anything I could ever imagine, I’m open to receiving any and all good opportunities that come from this.”

You may not know how big of a deal it is for Me to START at that place, with those thoughts. Not to say that the anxious thoughts didn’t show up at all, they were sat, but I was able to counter those thoughts with thoughts that made my nervous system more calm. The best part about it - it wasn’t like I was lying to myself. I genuinely don’t know at this moment how this thing is gonna pan out, so why not leave room for the possibility of it unfolding beautifully? Miraculously? Magically? Of course it can! And damnit, I deserve it.

So, there. That’s where I am. I often feel afraid that I block my blessings by not being 1000 percent (the percent sign doesn’t work either lol) sure what I want. If I don’t have hyper focus on the life I want to create, who knows where I’ll end up? That’s the thing though - truly, who knows? It could be amazing - where I’m headed just might be somewhere much too remarkable for Me to ever dream up. So, I’m open. I’m going forward, trusting that anywhere I land is where I’m meant to be. This life is going to be beautiful and it’s okay that I don’t map it all out line by line.

Thank You God.